Thursday 8 March 2012

ANTM CYCLE 18: BRITISH INVASION...EPISODE 2: THE MAKEOVERS!

My favorite episode of every ANTM season is the makeover episode...I know it's wrong but it's fun watching pretty girls cry cuz someone cut their hair...'MY HAIR IS MY WHOLE BEING...IT'S WHO I AM...I DON'T KNOW HOW TO MODEL ANYMORE...BOO HOO!'
As usual there's a lame bit about how Tyra's phone was hacked and what the makeovers are going to be have been leaked...apparently, she's taking inspiration from the European catwalks, all funky shapes and colors! Oh, there will be crying!
Of course, the Native American girl, Mariah, says if her hair is cut she'll lose her culture...dum dum dummmm...she just ends up with bangs or a fringe as they're called in the U.K. But two other American girls, Eboni and Kyle have bangs too! Uh Oh!
So, Louise the Brit throws a fit about them cutting and dying her hair and as usual after it's done she's like 'I'm the most powerful one here!' Whatever.
Sophie the Brit has pink candy floss hair. Cute. And Catherine has bright red hair. Stunning.
AzMarie already had an almost shaved head and they shaved ANTM into it all hip hop stylee...lame. As she was the first ones done, she 'helped' aka flirted with the other girls by shampooing their hair.
Don't really remember anyone else...oops.
Haggis
They're are now back at the house and have a mini competition where the Americans have to eat British found including haggis and cockles and the Brits have to eat American food like pigs feet and chittering...ewwww. But it's not like either of them actually eat that shit at home except for the Marmite and peanut butter. Ashley's Scottish and she doesn't even eat haggis.
Seymone and Candace start to fight in the kitchen...not good to fight with your own teammates girls!
Time for the photo shoot and yet again it's fucking Kris Jenner aka Kardashian! And all the girls are losing there shit just like last season...I really don't understand it. Even the Brits and we don't even really get any of their shows over here.
The theme of the shoot is that the models are Kris's 'toddlers' and of course her two youngest daughters, Kendell and Kylie are also in the pics.
Sophie and Ashley are doing a breakdown of each photo through out the shoot, which is hilarious. Of course Ashley is subtitled...but fair enough, she is Scottish.
I really hope they don't do what they did last week in elimination and make the girls have Union Jack and American flag lips...tacky! Okay, no tacky lips but they are still wearing flag t-shirts...in case we all forget who's on what team. Dumb. The funny thing is, Tyra has to watch herself and can't really do her bad 'english' accent when she talks. Ha!
Catherine, Laura and Sophie
First up...AzMaire and Ashley. Ashley gets really good comments, I reckon she's safe. AzMarie doesn't get very good ones and everyone's shocked because they think she's gonna go far!
Next up is Kyle and Mariah. Kris, who is also one of the judges this week, really liked what she did...but Kelly and Tyra don't they think she's too sexy. Kyle is just kinda boring...just a model and no toddler. Doesn't look good girls.
A trio is up next Catherine, Laura and Sophie...It's Nigel's favorite of the shoot. They all get good comments and some advice too. I think they're all safe.
Next is the 'chocolate babies' according to Tyra...Candace and Eboni. They both get good comments. Especially Eboni, who got burnt by a curling iron during the makeovers...as Tyra said 'you can burn me but you can't break me.'
Now it's time for Seymone, who got best photo last time, and Analiese. Doh! They both get really bad comments.
Last but not least, Louise and Alisha. Tyra says Louise looks like Linda Evangelista but she is too sexy in the photo. Alisha is not portraying what she is thinking.
Mariah
But who get best photo and who's going home?

Laura, with the 'red, white and blue' hair, who posed like a broken doll, gets best photo!

And who is going home? Well, it's not one of the Brits! Whoo-hoo! The bottom two are Seymone and Mariah...and it's Mariah heading back to her tribe. But she still plans on being the first Natie American Super Model.


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Thursday 1 March 2012

ANTM...BRITS VS. AMERICANS!

As an American in the U.K. and having watched both America's Next Top Model and Britain's Next Top Model, I may just be the perfect person the write about the newest 'cycle' of ANTM...the British Invasion!
There are seven Americans and seven British girls competing against each other this season...but there's a twist! The British models have all been on Britain's Next Top Model in the past. They have an edge over the Americans! Even though I'm American I find this to be really funny and I'm rooting for the British girls...especially one of my faves, Scottish Ashley.
The American girls are being typically American, all 'USA! USA! USA!'...annoying.
So, first photo shoot...the theme is 'iconic people' from each country:
George Washington vs. Queen Elizabeth I (makes sense)
Janet Jackson vs. Mel B (kinda makes sense)
Madonna vs. Elton John...what the?
Michelle Obama vs. Margaret Thatcher (kinda makes sense)
Andy Warhol vs. Amy Winehouse...what the? part 2...artist vs. singer?!?
Pocahontas vs. John Lennon...huh? Why not Bob Dylan?
Jackie O vs. Princess Diana (makes sense)

Time for elimination...Tyra makes an announcement saying that even though she's American, she's not going to be biased. And then she reads out the prizes...um, a single produced and released by I don't really care? Isn't this a 'modeling' competition!?!
Also, there's a new judge! Kelly Cutrone, famous fashion PR...she does not mince words and I know she's gonna be amazing! Oh yeah, Kelly Osbourne is the guest judge...I guess because she's British but has mostly lived in the U.S.
First up Eboni as Jackie O and Ashley as Princess Di...neither of them got very good critiques...doh.
Next is Laura as Madonna and Elisha as Elton...Laura got slightly better feedback than Elisha. But Kelly C. told her to not be so negative.
Up next...Catherine as Queenie and AzMarie as George Washington...Catherine got great feedback, AzMarie got alright comments but Tyra wants more 'Umph!'
Now it's...Mariah as Pocahontas and Jasmia as John Lennon...They both got bad feedback...one of which was 'I don't see how these two people fit together'...which is not their fault.
Next!...Kyle as Andy Warhol and Louise as Amy Winehouse...Kyle got really good comments, Louise not so good...boring from all angles.
Who's next?...Candace as Janet, Miss Jackson if you're nasty, and Annaliese as Mel B aka Scary Spice...which ironic cuz they say her face is too angry...and then they say that Candace is not angry enough for Janet! Confused!?!
Last but not least...Seymone as the First Lady and Sophie as the Iron Lady...they both get the best comments. Tyra says Sophie is 'Judge Judy combined with Margaret Thatcher'.
Best Picture is: Seymone!
But who gets eliminated!?!? Bottom two are Brits...Jasmia and Ashley.
And Jasmia is back on the plane to the U.K. Her John Lennon was super weak.
Yeah! Ashley gets to stay another week! Whew...

Next week...MAKEOVERS!
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